The 5 Types of Coworkers (And Which One You Are)

Welcome to the Work Zoo

Every workplace has its cast. The one who’s always prepared. The one who’s never on mute. The one who somehow knows everything before everyone else.

Let’s break it down:

1. The Spreadsheet Sorcerer

Color-coded tabs. Formulas for everything. This person built a dashboard before lunch… just for fun.

• Catchphrase: “I made a tracker.”

• Superpower: Making chaos look organized

• Weakness: Will side-eye your messy Google Doc

2. The Vibes Coordinator

Reads the room too well. Somehow always has snacks. Starts the group chat, keeps morale alive.

• Catchphrase: “Should we do a happy hour?”

• Superpower: Emotional glue of the team

• Weakness: Will crash hard during budget season

3. The Stealth Overachiever

Quiet. Efficient. Low profile. Then drops a project so good it makes the room go silent.

• Catchphrase: “It’s done, just didn’t want to bug anyone.”

• Superpower: Gets more done in 4 hours than most do in 8

• Weakness: Might vanish mid-Zoom without explanation

4. The Chaos Agent

Shows up late, somehow still nails it. Ideas flying everywhere. Needs a project manager, stat.

• Catchphrase: “Wait, what meeting?”

• Superpower: Innovation on caffeine

• Weakness: Structure. Deadlines. Remembering passwords.

5. The Human LinkedIn Feed

Always talking trends. Knows every webinar. Updates their resume… recreationally.

• Catchphrase: “Have you read that Harvard Business Review article?”

• Superpower: Thought leadership (and actual leadership)

• Weakness: Can be a lot on Mondays

Which One Are You?

Truth is, we’re all a little bit of each depending on the day, the team, and the mood. And that’s the magic of work: the people.

(But also… stop sending “Quick pings” at 4:58pm. We see you.)